Samantha Ronson’s Got Jokes

Lindsay Lohan has stirred a verbal battle between celebrity comic, Joan Rivers and ex-lesbian lover, Samantha Ronson. The DJ, Ronson, came to LiLo’s defense after Rivers had begun to poke fun at Lindsay after her courtroom shenanigans.

The 77-year-old Rivers tweeted, “Lindsay Lohan said she wouldn’t mind being under oath because she thought Oath was a Norwegian ski instructor.” In regards to Lindsay’s profane manicure, Rivers later tweeted, “Lindsay Lohan is so dumb. Her idea of being sworn in is cursing at the judge.”

Ronson, 32, found it hard to find the humor is Rivers’ tweets and lashed back tweeting, “Hey Joan Rivers- you have collagen older than Lindsay, pick on someone your own age, oh wait, I guess people that old can’t hear.”

After the minor battle of the twitches (Twitter bitches) LiLo thanked Sam retweeting, “@samantharonson thank you I love yams x.”

Recently Lindsay Lohan was spotted kissing Jessica Alba’s husband, Cash Warren, but the troubled actress strongly denies the rumor. At the same time it seems that Lindsay is envious over Alba’s friendship with her lesbian ex, DJ Samantha Ronson, The National Enquirer reports.

It appears that 23 years old Lindsay has some information saying that 28 years old Jessica Alba spent a night partying with Sam at Hollywood hotspot Teddy’s.

“I think Lindsay has the crazy idea that Jessica has the hots for Sam — even though she and Cash are happily married! So now Lindsay is retaliating by coming on to Cash. I’m sure Lindsay knew Jessica would find out she and Cash hung out. So she made a point of throwing herself at him and flirting like crazy. Lindsay has also been pestering Cash about working on a film or TV project together, with her starring and him producing”, one source revealed.

Lindsay Lohan took to her Twitter early Thursday morning to call girlfriend Samantha Ronson out on her “supposed” bullshit!

“Can you make an attempt to not ruin anything positive that I have FINALLY deserved just to cry myself to sleep with your cheats, errors, and thank you… for being a friend before a sell-out,” she wrote.

Uhhhh, what the hell is she talking about?!

She continued, “The term “self out” was coined from ME and I gave them sooooooo much insight. For their not only COMPLETE, BUT SUBSTANISAN ***FRIENDS***********”

Way to make up your own word, Linds! P.S. Is this making any sense to anyone else? Girl must’ve been completely coked out of her mind.

She ended her Twitter rampage with these words to Samantha, “BUT YOU DID perform to her..you JUST told me that your friends are worth more than i am 2 your family & that i’m gross*thx.”

Samantha had no response to Lindsay’s meltdown! Or maybe she addressed her crazy antics over a phone call like most normal and sane people would do.

Crazy!!

This might just signal the turn of events for our dear Lindsay Lohan. Or it could well be a reaffirmation of the beginning of the end for her.

Yesterday she got a bunch of collagen injected into her lips to compliment her stringy hair and went shopping for three hours in a closed store.

Her new look or another retaliation to her disintegrating love-life? You decide.

They had a rather tumultuous evening on Sunday night, but by Monday afternoon (July 20) Lindsay Lohan was all smiles as she left Samantha Ronson’s home.

According to the paparazzi on the scene, the “Mean Girls” gal and her on/off girlfriend had a big fight, with Samantha throwing Lindsay’s clothes out of the house around 6:30am. However, as LiLo left hours later, it appeared that they had reconciled their rift.

Other Lindsay News

Lindsay’s sister Ali recently told press that when she goes for a visit, she doesn’t worry about bringing clothes with her, as Lindsay has a more than ample supply of freebies from the world’s leading designers.

“When I go to visit her in L.A., I don’t even bring a suitcase. My mom is like, ‘Where’s your suitcase?’ and I’m like, ‘Mom, seriously, have you seen her closet? I don’t need one!’”